my irls follow me now this is so scary 🇵🇸🍉

Europe (yur·uhp) is an exotic peninsula in the extreme westernmost reaches of Asia with many fascinating cultures and landscapes and home to many of the world's last remaining feudal kingdoms, offering a glimpse back into a more simplistic way of living.

big fan of liars. big fan of characters whose entire existence is a facade. love it when everything's stripped away from them and the lie is the only thing left of their identity. love it when the lines between an act and the truth are blurring. are they even them without the lie? the lie doesn't become the truth per se, but it's now such an intricate part of them it might as well be.

Finding your horizon

hi did you know that ancient mesopotamians buried their dead under the floors of their own houses to always be close to them? i can't write a poem about this but by god i will write a master's thesis

hey, remember this? i just successfully defended this master's thesis and i'm now officially an archaeologist

we need a universal grocery classification system like the dewey decimal to aid in shelving, so i don’t have to figure out whether you think maple syrup goes with the sauces, breakfast foods, jams, or condiments

I figured it out

SANS: Steven After Not Surviving

SENSHI: Steven Eats Nutritious Savory Healthy Items

Just looked at a blog where the header description said 'sometimes I reblog posts I like so I don't forget them'.

And I feel like that, right there, explains so much about how the site has changed in the last few months.

People now think reblogging is an unusual behaviour, rather than a default.

Tumblr newbies, please, for the love of baby Jesus, reblog the posts you like. That is the whole reason the site exists - for you to collect all your shiny fandom objects in a single space. Which you can organize to your heart's content. Or not organize at all, if that's your jam.

Our blogs are intended to be collections of posts, not collections of likes.

THE ENTIRE POINT OF TUMBLR IS REBLOGGING.

Liking does absolutely nothing. There is no algorithm like on IG that will use likes to throw content at people. If you don’t reblog, then no one who doesn’t follow that person (or happen to find it in the tags) will see that post.

Tumblr is supposed to be your bookcase where you show off all of your pretties: the posts you like and the ones that you want to promote to support the other creators in your fandom/community.

People are so stupid about snakes. If there's a little black racer chilling outside just leave it alone, you don't have to kill it, it's probably dealing with all your pests for you, jesus christ

If you kill a non venomous snake that's just silly and cruel and betrays a disgusting worldview of blind hatred and fear of other beings,

and if you kill a venomous snake that's VERY STUPID because trying to kill a venomous snake is the best way to get bitten by a venomous snake.

the last coral snake fatality in florida that I could find was due to the person who died trying to kill it, as a note

specs stop throwing snakes

I WOULD HAVE PREFERRED NOT TO THROW HIM BUT I WAS IN A HURRY

memes cats would make

[ID: a simple chart showing two captioned illustrations. the first is a drawing of a smiling person labeled "The Person." underneath are bullet points which say: "nice to me," "calls me good boy names like Dumb Sausage and Stop," "put dinner," and "holding me because i never be bad." the second is a frowning person with an angry vacuum cleaner labeled "The Person (evil alter ego???) and the bullet points read: "LOUD," "maybe possessed by Bad devil or evil etc," and "chases me except if i hide behind the ladder thats been in the living room for 6 months it can't find me."]

I got to hold a 500,000 year old hand axe at the museum today.

It's right-handed

I am right-handed

There are grooves for the thumb and knuckle to grip that fit my hand perfectly

I have calluses there from holding my stylus and pencils and the gardening tools.

There are sharper and blunter parts of the edge, for different types of cutting, as well as a point for piercing.

I know exactly how to use this to butcher a carcass.

A homo erectus made it

Some ancestor of mine, three species ago, made a tool that fits my hand perfectly, and that I still know how to use.

Who were you

A man? A woman? Did you even use those words?

Did you craft alone or were you with friends? Did you sing while you worked?

Did you find this stone yourself, or did you trade for it? Was it a gift?

Did you make it for yourself, or someone else, or does the distinction of personal property not really apply here?

Who were you?

What would you think today, seeing your descendant hold your tool and sob because it fits her hands as well?

What about your other descendant, the docent and caretaker of your tool, holding her hands under it the way you hold your hands under your baby's head when a stranger holds them.

Is it bizarre to you, that your most utilitarian object is now revered as holy?

Or has it always been divine?

Or is the divine in how I am watching videos on how to knap stone made by your other descendants, learning by example the way you did?

Tomorrow morning I am going to the local riverbed in search of the appropriate stones, and I will follow your example.

The first blood spilled on it will almost certainly be my own, as I learn the textures and rhythm of how it's done.

Did you have cuss words back then? Gods to blaspheme when the rock slips and you almost take your thumbnail off instead? Or did you just scream?

I'm not religious.

But if spilling my own blood to connect with a stranger who shared it isn't partaking in the divine

I don't know what is.

This is the axe

My knuckle rests exactly in the triangular plane just above the orange intrusion, and my thumb on the plane with the white patches.

How many hands held it just like that? How many generations was this passed down? Were you lost? or did you fall into disuse when technology improved?

Do you still desire to be held?

This was the axe that made me ugly cry in the museum. It was created half a million years ago by either Erectus or Heidelburgensis, and was passed down from person to person, long enough that somehow a neanderthal picked it up, and passed it down to their family.

It has now felt 3 generations of human species hands, it's smooth but still sharp except where the very tip has been broken off, but it shows that this axe was loved and taken care of. And it is still being taken care of! It was used to teach archaic children to build, to carve meat, to break bones, and now it is being used to teach us about all those people who came before us and put their hands right where we put ours.

The fact that @gallusrostromegalus and I put our hands on the same place and felt the same rush of emotions only days apart is amazing, but its not new. People loved this axe, it belonged to their loved ones and it's full of all those emotions. And if there's anything to take away from humanity, new and old, it's that we love a good rock.

Hello! You and I never met, but I feel like we've held hands now, the same way that we held hands with everyone else who's held that axe, and I think that's lovely :)

The sex shop I worked at had an awesome table to display condoms. It was a two tier round table. It had holders for buckets full of loose single condoms, and in front of each bucket was an inflated condom of that type. Like a less wacky inflatable tube dick.

At first the visual was really silly, but honestly it was fantastic because people got to see the size and shape of a condom and they could mix and match to experiment with which brands they liked best.

The only catch was that the display condoms needed a hole punctured through them, otherwise they’d blow up forever and pop. It was truly hilarious when we had to change out a display condom. When the old one came off all the other condoms would flop in limp unison as all the air escaped.

Then we’d fit the new condom and stab it a few times. They’d all slowly puff hesitantly back up together, raising in tentative unison.

But sometimes we’d still need to adjust the new one. It was a balance between enough holes to keep it erect without over inflating but not too much air escaping to flop them all.

That’s how one day a man watched me walking away from the condom table with a pin in hand and visibly blanched, thinking that none of the condoms were safe. I had to frantically explain our tables air pressure system before he panicked.

"constantly changing and shifting architectural landscape" really is one of my favourite settings for a story because it encompasses two similar but distinct niches of existential horror

illustrative diagram i made to explain my point

a story itself is, of course, both of these at once - you are trapped within a living organism more vast and multifaceted than your own understanding of it can ever hope to contain, and subject to the whims of its architect, the author

You should be starting a recipe book. I don't give a shit if you're only 20-years-old. The modern web is rotting away bit by bit before our very eyes. You have no idea when that indie mom blog is going down or when Pinterest will remove that recipe. Copy it down in a notebook, physically or digitally. Save it somewhere only you can remove it. Trust me, looking for a recipe only to find out it's been wiped off the internet is so fucking sad. I've learned my lesson one too many times.