☆☆☆

the x files is funny because at the time it was “progressive” or whatever to have the ultra-rational, levelheaded character be a woman

but it’s also a show where all the fucked up alien shit actually is real, so she’s just constantly wrong about everything

What’s funny is how often they’re both wrong. Mulder will be like “the victims all had their livers scooped clean out this is obviously the aliens escalating from cattle mutilation” and Scully will be like “don’t be silly Mulder this is clearly just a serial killer who’s really good with surgical tools” and then it turns out the actual killer is an immortal sewer man who comes out ever quarterly century to feast on human liver.

I cannot stress enough that this is literally the plot of an actual episode

the ghost of one specific homosexual cowboy regularly possesses Tumblr gays

things im scared will climb through my window at night: clowns, nosferatus, the river strid,

[ID: Tweet by madoka magicock @rifflexielian: "Terfs need to shut up about womanhood, my mom was raised to believe all women were less valuable than men and cried when she learned about trans women because the idea that someone would fight that hard to be a woman was radical for her and meant it was something worth being"/end ID]

this is my cursed jug i have that bleeds when you pour water in it. 

we’ve done this ten, twenty times now to no apparent change?

haunted

I’m 100% certain this is glaze fuckery but the delivery of “it’s bleeding!  It’s possessed.” is absolutely the best thing

Bad paint?

That’s a Time Bomb/Biohazard!!!

The glaze on the inside and outside of the Jug has developed cracks which when the Water is added causes the darker red clay under the white glaze to absorb the water. This in turn makes the Jug “Sweat” or “Bleed”. But it also compromises the integrity of the Jug as the Clay inside is becoming soggy as it absorbs the water. It’s also a breeding ground for Bacteria and Mold as the Clay can’t properly dry inside the glaze.

So it’s either going to fall apart and shatter into a bizillion little pieces.

Or it’s going to become a rancid smelling object that would Poison anything that Drinks/Absorbs the water put inside it.

So it’s cursed

But like

Scientifically cursed

Most curses are science we don’t understand

“most curses are science we don’t understand” woah ok there pal there’s no need to crash through half my reality and light it on fire like calm down

For those who aren’t getting the brilliance- this couple (?) is streaming World of Warcraft and I think are dressed up as their characters. Two normal sized people, one of whom is playing a dwarf. And who takes it upon himself to pretend to be too short to just get off his chair and then, aware that his SO also has her camera going, proceeds to walk across the frame on his knees to give the illusion that he’s actually that short.

been working on collapsing harry styles and timothee chalamet into one celebrity entity in my mind to make room for more important stuff like the locations of nuts that i buried before winter

@todaysbird

reblog for noises

r/undertale is so bored that they're just pretending that they know nothing about the game now and I'm starting to get worried about them

Somebody get these guys some enrichment

Theory

i umderstand

Fun fact: Cheetahs only attack prey that runs

jesus that is good to know.

Yup, that’s the point you just stay still and let it do whatever the fuck it wants that doesn’t involved you getting eaten. 

REALLY FUN FACT for big cats cheetahs are fucking docile as shit

my grandfather ran a cheetah sanctuary in south africa and he’d just lie with them and sleep among them and they’d rub against him and chirp at him they’re big fucking babies

Another Fun Fact: Cheetahs are incredibly nervous animals. One of the (many) reason’s they’re going extinct is that cheetahs are so sensitive and nervous, some of them are literally too nervous to breed. Others will breed, but stress themselves out so much, they’ll lose their cubs. So zoos with breeding programs had to figure out how to make cheetahs comfortable enough to first of all, get laid and secondly - not spazz themselves into miscarrying. So what’d they do? They gave the cheetah’s their very own Service Dogs! The dogs make them feel safe, protected and secure!

AJHHHHFDDGHH SO PRECIOUS

this post just got so much better

THIS IS OFFICIALLY MY FAVOURITE POST

this is emmett and cullen they are best friends

This is the greatest thing I’ve seen all day.

Dogs are truly angels.

so THATS why these cheetah ft dogo pics exist

the anxiety cat

Also! Cheetahs are not in fact classified as big cats, they are simply very large lesser cats, due to the fact that they purr, meow, chirp, and cannot roar. Also many cheetahs have learned to recognize wildlife photographers are friends and not foes, so they will just come up to people and be friendly occasionally as pictured at the top of the chain. Some will even leave their Cubs with photographers to look after while they hunt. So. Yeah. Cheetahs are great

this works because cheetahs are actually fairly social animals, and they look to members of their group for context on how worried they should be about any given Situation. but since cheetahs are also nervous social animals, they can work each other into an anxiety spiral pretty easily over things like “being in an enclosed habitat” and “there’s a guy over there”.

so by introducing a dog as a member of the group, the cheetahs will now look to the dog for context clues on how worried they should be! and the dog Is Not Worried At All, Thanks, so the cheetahs think everything must be chill even if they were personally unsure about it, and they stop being so freaked out about literally everything.

Cheetah: oh god what’s going on how are we feeling weird spotless cheetah

Dog: :) fine, thanks

Cheetah: :) oh, okay

Those girls from saw 3