"You gaze upon your crushed army and my massed forces, why do you smile?". The captured general looked to the cloudless sky before answering "Because it's about to rain"

You grew up with a super hero mother and what you assumed was a regular stay at home dad. Until your powers, awakened, of course, but they weren't like your mom's, quite the opposite… Your dad gladly welcomed you to the "family business" though.

The big bad had been sealed for a thousand years and finally was released. Turns out, a thousand years of solitary confinement isn't great psychologically.

"What do you mean you 'accidentally' killed the entire pantheon?"

It has been said “A man will do great and terrible things to protect his loved ones.” You’re a retired god about to educate a young upstart god why you were so feared by the others when he came after your wife.

“We’re sorry, we didn’t know she was your daughter!” “And that’s your justification? You’re sorry because the vulnerable little girl you kidnapped was the wrong little girl? Are you saying you wouldn’t be sorry if it was any other little girl?”

Your mother sold her firstborn to a witch in exchange for beauty and your father sold his firstborn to a fairy for wealth. Today you are born.

Satisfied, you happily die of old age in your bed, knowing that they cannot prosecute you for what you’ve done. 400 years later, you are resurrected in front of a tribunal.

The alien ambassador looked at the strange creatures before him. No two looked alike. Some were tall, terrifyingly so, while others were absolutely tiny. Many were covered in fur, though a few were completely hairless. And one even appeared to be synthetic. "What do you mean you're all Human?"

“I shall grant you and your sister one wish each, but think carefully on your wish, for you won’t get another.” “I wish for my sister to know the wisest thing to wish for.”

Never smile at a crocodile. Not because they’ll bite you, but they’re very lonely creatures. Once one of them thinks you’re its friend, it will follow you EVERYWHERE.

An old dragon just wants to be left alone, but the new village that just cropped up a few decades ago keep leaving gifts at his doorstep… and now they've just left a maiden!

Your Paladin companion died, and you, a Changeling, have worn their shape since and continued their mission. The Order your friend belonged to knows who you are and politely rejected you, but does not stop you. No one else knows.