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Breakfast At Ralf's

@ralfmaximus / ralfmaximus.tumblr.com

49% Evil is not half bad
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ralfmaximus
elephantswithpants asked:

hello may we please see the frog or perhaps the website? (if you don’t want to share that’s totally okay) thank you for the story!!

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ralfmaximus answered:

Alas, this occurred in 1995 and the company is long gone.

The demo was actually conducted using his laptop browser opening his site off-line; no webserver involved. Just a collection of pages stored on his drive C: that frog-guy created using notepad.exe, an impressive feat at the time. Once he onboarded we let him host his frog menagerie on the corporate LAN but I don't think we ever gave it public access.

Our project manager (also at the interview) nabbed the computer-frog instantly and I haven't spoken with anybody from that organization since 1998, so... yeah.

If I had the froggy I'd show y'all. And yes, it’s all true.

(If you’re wondering what the heck this is about, it’s about this.)

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ralfmaximus

Since the Ceramic Frog thing has regained traction and I’m getting asks, here ya go.

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perennialgarden

The Complete Home Office, Alvin Rosenbaum, 1995

the dream of the 90s

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foone

YOU GOTTA STAND UP TO PUT FLOPPY DISKS IN. WHAT FOOL DESIGNED THIS MESS?

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areweperfectlywhelmedyet

You know when that printer was chugging out a document that whole goddamn thing was shaking back and forth like there was an earthquake.

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ralfmaximus

Also they seem to have perfected wireless power distribution.

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Rewatching The Good Place, and our heroes have just arrived at The Bad Place. Where they are viewing Pirates of the Caribbean 6, The Haunted Crow's Nest Or Something, Who Gives a Crap.

Now playing everywhere, forever.

I'd forgotten how much I love this show.

#the good place
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The Ten Commandments must be displayed in Louisiana classrooms under requirement signed into law
Louisiana has become the first state to require that the Ten Commandments be displayed in every public school classroom. Republican Gov.
AP News
BATON ROUGE, La. (AP) — Louisiana has become the first state to require that the Ten Commandments be displayed in every public school classroom under a bill signed into law by Republican Gov. Jeff Landry on Wednesday. The GOP-drafted legislation mandates that a poster-sized display of the Ten Commandments in “large, easily readable font” be required in all public classrooms, from kindergarten to state-funded universities.

Hmm. Cue malicious compliance... for example, they neglected to specify which language. You haven't truly experienced the Ten Commandments until you've read them in their original Klingon.

#us politics#education
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Music Just Changed Forever
Making sense of AI’s impact on an entire field of human culture.
persuasion.community
A few weeks ago, a company called Suno released a new version of its AI-generated music app to the public. It works much like ChatGPT: You type in a prompt describing the song you’d like… and it creates it. The results are, in my view, absolutely astounding. So much so that I think it will be viewed by history as the end of one musical era and the start of the next one. Just as The Bomb reshaped all of warfare, we’ve reached the point where AI is going to reshape all of music.

Are you ready to hate AI even more than you did a few minutes ago?

Ready to experience the enshittification of music?

Article includes links to shitty AI examples.

#ai#bullshit
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How to eat a Triceratops - Nature
Tyrannosaurus tore the head off armoured prey to reach the tender neck meat.
Nature
As Fowler and his colleagues examined the various types of bite mark on the skulls, they were intrigued by the extensive puncture and pull marks on the neck frills on some of the specimens. At first, this seemed to make no sense. “The frill would have been mostly bone and keratin,” says Fowler. “Not much to eat there.” The pulling action and the presence of deep parallel grooves led the team to realise that these marks were probably not indicative of actual eating, but repositioning of the prey. The scientists suggest that the frills were in the way of Tyrannosaurus as it was trying to get at the nutrient-rich neck muscles.

Yummy.

#dinosaurs#jurrassic bork bork bork#und nao weer reepin da heds offa da treeseerotopz
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Juneteenth is a federal holiday.

"But in Alabama, Arizona, Arkansas, Florida, Idaho, Iowa, Louisiana, New Hampshire, Oklahoma, South Carolina, Tennessee, and Texas; Republicans have passed laws to prevent teachers from teaching kids why."

M D'Arrigo

Source: mastodon.social
#juneteenth#june 19th
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shiftythrifting

Things That Like Carrots are lurking in the waters and are for sale for only 15$ on Facebook marketplace.

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7fragment
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unbfacts
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rickmctumbleface

Smiles, everyone, smiles.

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weaselle

this is one of TWO great new tooth therapies i've been very interested in!

in one, they pack your cavities or cracked tooth or whatever with stem cells and then trigger those stem cells to become tooth cells and your tooth basically heals itself :D

in this one, they basically tell your genes, "hey, remember that bit of genetic code that caused your body to grow a whole new set of teeth when you were like 8 years old? Yeah, run that code again right here" or, more accurately, what they really do is tell your body to temporarily stop running the extra bit of code that prevents you continuously growing new teeth like a shark.

anyway, can you imagine? Right now if you lose an adult tooth, in order to replace it they have to drill into your skull bones and screw in a fake one. In ten years you might be able to just... grow a new one! the future of dentistry is about to be so cool!

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kitty-husband

https://www.kyoto-u.ac.jp/en/research-news/2021-03-31

https://globalnews.ca/news/9984605/tooth-regrowth-drug/amp/

https://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2024/may/30/groundbreaking-human-trial-tooth-regeneration-drug/

Fact checked! It's true and researchers hope to have a publicly available therapy by 2030!

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ralfmaximus

This is very exciting for obvious reasons, but also less obvious cyberpunk writing reasons:

  • futuristic gang soldiers featuring Too Many Teeth
  • tooth regrowth hormones as a terrorist weapon
  • humans growing animal teeth for the aesthetic
  • multimedia teeth using grown OLED tech
  • IDing a corpse via dental records becomes problematic
  • fans regrowing their teeth (at home!) to match their favorite celebrity's teeth
Source: Yahoo!
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7fragment
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inkskinned

somewhere out there someone has probably used AI to write their wedding vows. someone out there is probably loading their hinge profile with AI quippy responses. when i close my eyes i picture a man hunting through chatGPT prompts, trying to get someone else to love him. maybe she sends him back chatGPT too, and two robots fall in love.

is this our new lives, then? is love scripted? i have a dandelion heart and some part of me wants to believe that AI will not obtain self-reliance by evil but instead by discovering the single perfect shape of love - the one thing humanity (in all our time and force) could never quite nail down. maybe it will be a string of numbers. the imprint of static, the universe's thumbprint. maybe it will just be a single long mirror, and jam dripping down your hands.

i know there are "good" reasons. i was nervous! or i was unsure how to say it! but - i want your nervous words. i want your unsure words. i want you to strike entire pages of work for me. i want you to gesture vaguely, to ransack your mind for ways to instead-of-saying just show me. i want to find where your words fail you and where the summer of your longing blazes out of you, infinite, resisting the capture of definition.

and i want to do the same for you. isn't any love worth a little bit of struggle? i want to shiver with the movie-ripe sense my friends are lovely and i am so tender towards them - i want to never quite be able to explain what it means to spend my life with them. i want to draw shapes on your skin that exit the geometric and fade into the same, wordless pattern. it is still love if silent. you know - i rarely, if ever, actually tell my siblings i love them? i just show up often, and hope the action does the talking.

i know AI is "easier". of course. buttoned up and seamlessly corporate. but i do not want to love you through a film. i do not want to love you with your edges sanded down. i cannot recognize myself in you if you are unmarred and glistening. something about how, with the crystal-clear mp3 files of the present, we ache for the scratch of vinyl. the flaws are what make love worth it. i want the raw and the windbeaten and the unkempt.

something tender, then. i love you because you're real, which means that you cannot be perfect.

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