Anonymous asked: I want to live by myself when I move out of my parent's place but I'm really afraid of money problems? I'm afraid that the only place I can afford will be in the ghetto and it'll all be torn apart and I'll only be allowed to eat one granola bar a week. I'm really stressing out about this. I don't know anything about after school life. I don't know anything about paying bills or how to buy an apartment and it's really scaring me. is there anything you know that can help me?
HI darling,
I’ve actually got a super wonderful masterpost for you to check out:
Home
- what the hell is a mortgage?
- first apartment essentials checklist
- how to care for cacti and succulents
- the care and keeping of plants
- Getting an apartment
Money
- earn rewards by taking polls
- how to coupon
- what to do when you can’t pay your bills
- see if you’re paying too much for your cell phone bill
- how to save money
- How to Balance a Check Book
- How to do Your Own Taxes
Health
- how to take care of yourself when you’re sick
- things to bring to a doctor’s appointment
- how to get free therapy
- what to expect from your first gynecologist appointment
- how to make a doctor’s appointment
- how to pick a health insurance plan
- how to avoid a hangover
- a list of stress relievers
- how to remove a splinter
Emergency
- what to do if you get pulled over by a cop
- a list of hotlines in a crisis
- things to keep in your car in case of an emergency
- how to do the heimlich maneuver
Job
- time management
- create a resume
- find the right career
- how to pick a major
- how to avoid a hangover
- how to interview for a job
- how to stop procrastinating
- How to write cover letters
Travel
- ULTIMATE PACKING LIST
- Traveling for Cheap
- Travel Accessories
- The Best Way to Pack a Suitcase
- How To Read A Map
- How to Apply For A Passport
- How to Make A Travel Budget
Better You
- read the news
- leave your childhood traumas behind
- how to quit smoking
- how to knit
- how to stop biting your nails
- how to stop procrastinating
- how to stop skipping breakfast
- how to stop micromanaging
- how to stop avoiding asking for help
- how to stop swearing constantly
- how to stop being a pushover
- learn another language
- how to improve your self-esteem
- how to sew
- learn how to embroider
- how to love yourself
- 100 tips for life
Apartments/Houses/Moving
- Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 1: Are You Sure? (The Responsible One)
- Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 2: Finding the Damn Apartment (The Responsible One)
- Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 3: Questions to Ask about the Damn Apartment (The Responsible One)
- Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 4: Packing and Moving All of Your Shit (The Responsible One)
- How to Protect Your Home Against Break-Ins (The Responsible One)
Education
- How to Find a Fucking College (The Sudden Adult)
- How to Find Some Fucking Money for College (The Sudden Adult)
- What to Do When You Can’t Afford Your #1 Post-Secondary School (The Sudden Adult)
- Stop Shitting on Community College Kids (Why Community College is Fucking Awesome) (The Responsible One)
- How to Ask for a Recommendation Letter (The Responsible One)
- How to Choose a College Major (The Sudden Adult)
Finances
- How to Write a Goddamn Check (The Responsible One)
- How to Convince Credit Companies You’re Not a Worthless Bag of Shit (The Responsible One)
- Debit vs Credit (The Responsible One)
- What to Do if Your Wallet is Stolen/Lost (The Sudden Adult)
- Budgeting 101 (The Responsible One)
- Important Tax Links to Know (The Responsible One)
- How to Choose a Bank Without Screwing Yourself (The Responsible One)
Job Hunting
- How to Write a Resume Like a Boss (The Responsible One)
- How to Write a Cover Letter Someone Will Actually Read (The Responsible One)
- How to Handle a Phone Interview without Fucking Up (The Responsible One)
- 10 Sites to Start Your Job Search (The Responsible One)
Life Skills
- Staying in Touch with Friends/Family (The Sudden Adult)
- Bar Etiquette (The Sudden Adult)
- What to Do After a Car Accident (The Sudden Adult)
- Grow Up and Buy Your Own Groceries (The Responsible One)
- How to Survive Plane Trips (The Sudden Adult)
- How to Make a List of Goals (The Responsible One)
- How to Stop Whining and Make a Damn Appointment (The Responsible One)
Miscellaneous
- What to Expect from the Hell that is Jury Duty (The Responsible One)
Relationships
- Marriage: What the Fuck Does It Mean and How the Hell Do I Know When I’m Ready? (Guest post - The Northwest Adult)
- How Fucked Are You for Moving In with Your Significant Other: An Interview with an Actual Real-Life Couple Living Together™ (mintypineapple and catastrofries)
Travel & Vehicles
- How to Winterize Your Piece of Shit Vehicle (The Responsible One)
- How to Make Public Transportation Your Bitch (The Responsible One)
Other Blog FeaturesAsks I’ll Probably Need to Refer People to Later
- Apartments (or Life Skills) - How Not to Live in Filth (The Sudden Adult)
- Finances - Tax Basics (The Responsible One)
- Important Documents - How to Get a Copy of Your Birth Certificate (The Responsible One)
- Important Documents - How to Get a Replacement ID (The Responsible One)
- Health - How to Deal with a Chemical Burn (The Responsible One)
- Job Hunting - List of Jobs Based on Social Interaction Levels (The Sudden Adult)
- Job Hunting - How to Avoid Falling into a Pit of Despair While Job Hunting (The Responsible One)
- Job Hunting - Questions to Ask in an Interview (The Responsible One)
- Life Skills - First-Time Flying Tips (The Sudden Adult)
- Life Skills - How to Ask a Good Question (The Responsible One)
- Life Skills - Reasons to Take a Foreign Language (The Responsible One)
- Life Skills - Opening a Bar Tab (The Sudden Adult)
- Relationships - Long Distance Relationships: How to Stay in Contact (The Responsible One)
Adult Cheat Sheet:
- what to do if your pet gets lost
- removing stains from your carpet
- how to know if you’re eligible for food stamps
- throwing a dinner party
- i’m pregnant, now what?
- first aid tools to keep in your house
- how to keep a clean kitchen
- learning how to become independent from your parents
- job interview tips
- opening your first bank account
- what to do if you lose your wallet
- tips for cheap furniture
- easy ways to cut your spending
- selecting the right tires for your car
- taking out your first loan
- picking out the right credit card
- how to get out of parking tickets
- how to fix a leaky faucet
- get all of your news in one place
- getting rid of mice & rats in your house
- when to go to the e.r.
- buying your first home
- how to buy your first stocks
- guide to brewing coffee
- first apartment essentials checklist
- coping with a job you hate
- 30 books to read before you’re 30
- what’s the deal with retirement?
- difference between insurances
Once you’ve looked over all those cool links, I have some general advice for you on how you can have some sort of support system going for you:
Reasons to move out of home
You may decide to leave home for many different reasons, including:
- wishing to live independently
- location difficulties – for example, the need to move closer to university
- conflict with your parents
- being asked to leave by your parents.
Issues to consider when moving out of home
It’s common to be a little unsure when you make a decision like leaving home. You may choose to move, but find that you face problems you didn’t anticipate, such as:
- Unreadiness – you may find you are not quite ready to handle all the responsibilities.
- Money worries – bills including rent, utilities like gas and electricity and the cost of groceries may catch you by surprise, especially if you are used to your parents providing for everything. Debt may become an issue.
- Flatmate problems – issues such as paying bills on time, sharing housework equally, friends who never pay board, but stay anyway, and lifestyle incompatibilities (such as a non-drug-user flatting with a drug user) may result in hostilities and arguments.
Your parents may be worried
Think about how your parents may be feeling and talk with them if they are worried about you. Most parents want their children to be happy and independent, but they might be concerned about a lot of different things. For example:
- They may worry that you are not ready.
- They may be sad because they will miss you.
- They may think you shouldn’t leave home until you are married or have bought a house.
- They may be concerned about the people you have chosen to live with.
Reassure your parents that you will keep in touch and visit regularly. Try to leave on a positive note. Hopefully, they are happy about your plans and support your decision.
Tips for a successful move
Tips include:
- Don’t make a rash decision – consider the situation carefully. Are you ready to live independently? Do you make enough money to support yourself? Are you moving out for the right reasons?
- Draw up a realistic budget – don’t forget to include ‘hidden’ expenses such as the property’s security deposit or bond (usually four weeks’ rent), connection fees for utilities, and home and contents insurance.
- Communicate – avoid misunderstandings, hostilities and arguments by talking openly and respectfully about your concerns with flatmates and parents. Make sure you’re open to their point of view too – getting along is a two-way street.
- Keep in touch – talk to your parents about regular home visits: for example, having Sunday night dinner together every week.
- Work out acceptable behaviour – if your parents don’t like your flatmate(s), find out why. It is usually the behaviour rather than the person that causes offence (for example, swearing or smoking). Out of respect for your parents, ask your flatmate(s) to be on their best behaviour when your parents visit and do the same for them.
- Ask for help – if things are becoming difficult, don’t be too proud to ask your parents for help. They have a lot of life experience.
If your family home does not provide support
Not everyone who leaves home can return home or ask their parents for help in times of trouble. If you have been thrown out of home or left home to escape abuse or conflict, you may be too young or unprepared to cope.
If you are a fostered child, you will have to leave the state-care system when you turn 18, but you may not be ready to make the sudden transition to independence.
If you need support, help is available from a range of community and government organisations. Assistance includes emergency accommodation and food vouchers. If you can’t call your parents or foster parents, call one of the associations below for information, advice and assistance.
Where to get help
- Your doctor
- Kids Helpline Tel. 1800 55 1800
- Lifeline Tel. 13 11 44
- Home Ground Services Tel. 1800 048 325
- Relationships Australia Tel. 1300 364 277
- Centrelink Crisis or Special Help Tel. 13 28 50
- Tenants Union of Victoria Tel. (03) 9416 2577
Things to remember
- Try to solve any problems before you leave home. Don’t leave because of a fight or other family difficulty if you can possibly avoid it.
- Draw up a realistic budget that includes ‘hidden’ expenses, such as bond, connection fees for utilities, and home and contents insurance.
- Remember that you can get help from a range of community and government organizations.
Keep me updated? xx
