Absurd. Useless. Maybe interesting?

yeah you caught me im actually in the pocket of Big Body Hair. they're paying me crazy amounts of money to brainwash impressionable women into ruining their bodies by not shaving their legs.

Paris

Jun 2024

I wanna see somebody pressure-wash that shit.

Job listing:

Routinely required to sit; walk; talk; hear; use hands to keyboard, finger, handle, and feel; stoop, kneel, crouch, twist, reach, and stretch.

they want me to finger?! at work?

WHAT KIND OF A JOB IS THIS?!

I mean...it's a good way to get information about when your co-workers last accessed the system that you're on, as well as a variety of other information if the sysop entered it, but that's not really relevant in modern companies that have dozens or hundreds (if not thousands) of VMs running Linux, is it?

happy Thursday the 20th

I’d have to wait months or even years for another chance to reblog this, so why the fuck not?

next days you can reblog this on a Thursday the 20th

August 2015

October 2016

April 2017

July 2017

September 2018

December 2018

June 2019

February 2020

August 2020

You know, just in case you wanted to set your queue for the next 6 years

TODAY

Since it’s now August 20, 2020… The next days you can reblog this on a Thursday the 20th:

If you wanted to set your queue for the next six years.

You know what, let's fill out the rest of the decade:

Today I explained why I can't really travel to Florida right now to my dad & watching him get increasingly frustrated with the realization that Transphobia Exists was honestly something else.

him: "well if you're not allowed to use the men's bathroom, just go to the women's! that'll show them."

me: "yeah but I'm just as likely to have the cops called on me for 'using the wrong bathroom' in there. have you seen me lately?"

him: "but if one of the options is wrong and not allowed then the other one has to be the right option. what do they want you to do?"

my grandma, helpfully: "I think they want trans people to not go to Florida"

my dad: spluttering frustratedly

me: "I think the thing is that you are more logical and reasonable than Ron DeSantis."

the face of a semi-reformed(?) conservative when realizing with dawning horror that laws can be unfair on purpose is truly special tbh

my grandma also questioned how often it actually happens that people are calling the cops on trans people in airport bathrooms & started talking about the statistics she wanted to look up, and I got to explain that there isn't even basic research on some decades-old trans healthcare procedures, so the statistics she wanted almost certainly did not exist.

the shocked outrage of someone learning for the first time that bigotry is bad is strangely comforting. reminds me that most people are pretty normal, I think.

#you are not a baby deer with a hair bow you are an eel with a gun

No, my BOSS (who is asking me to work 40 hours a week) is an eel with a gun. I am a baby deer with a hair bow.

Your average transgirl will ask "if I do this, is it cannibalism?" and then do it without waiting for the answer

Some of us wait to make sure the answer is yes first.

Exactly! It's like how people are always quoting this at me:

And it's totally wrong! I definitely thought about if I should do this. I determined that no, I shouldn't do this.

I then made this face:

AND I DID IT THE FUCK ANYWAY!

Had to screenshot it and save, because I know that I'm going to want it later.

The thing I'm waiting for is when we're living on multiple planets and the earthers can argue with martians (by which I mean humans who grew up on Mars) about who has the best mountains.

Cause obviously the Martians are gonna come out the gate with Olympus Mons. Tallest mountain in the whole solar system, baby!

But I think the terrans might have a point here that Everest/Sagarmāthā is a better mountain. It's an actual mountain, you have to CLIMB to get to the top. It's got vertical bits, like a mountain should have.

Olympus Mons may be huge, but you could summit it in a golf cart. It's just a gentle hill that doesn't stop going up. It's less a mountain you have to climb and more a road trip across France... Which it's the size of, admittedly.

Face it, marsboys. Y'all have the solar system's largest hillock. And as soon as you get that terraforming done, you'll have the biggest grassy knoll.

Meanwhile Venusians living in cloud cities be like

"look at these plebs living on the ground"

Hey look at me, I'm a terran in California, and I can walk outside without getting SULFURIC ACID rained on me!

It's weird that we're in a future where gas pumps play TikToks at you

We were supposed to have hovercars and warp drive, damn it!

Yall wanna hear a kinda funny, kinda sad story about my grandmother and hetero-normativity?

Ok, so... when my grandmother was in her 50s (I was an infant), she met a woman at the Unitarian Church. And, as can happen when you meet your soul mate, this event made it impossible for her to deny parts of herself that she had fiercely hidden her whole life.

All the drama- their affair being found out, the divorce with my grandfather, the court battle over who got the house, happened while I was a baby. Even in my earliest memories, it's just Mama Jo and Oma, and my grandfather lived elsewhere (first his own apartment, then a nursing home, then with us.)

But here's the thing- no one ever explained any of this to me. No one ever sat down and was like "hey, Rosie, so do you know what a lesbian is?" It was the 90s. It was Texas. I think my mom was still kinda processing all this, and just assumed that like... I was gonna figure it out. Don't mention it, let it just be normal. Like I think my mom thought that if she explained the situation, she would be making it weird? I dunno.

But like. In the 90s, in all the movies I had seen and books I had read, do you know how many same sex couples I had seen? Like. 0. Do you know how many "platonic best friend/roommates" I had seen? A lot. I had no context, is what I'm saying.

I literally thought this was a Golden Girls, roommates, besties situation until I was like...I dunno, 11? 12?

It was actually their parrot, an African Grey named Spike, imitating my grandmothers voice saying "Johanna, honey, it's getting late", that triggered the MIND BLOWN moment as I realized that *there's only one master bedroom and it only has 1 waterbed* when all the pieces finally clicked.

Anyway. I think it's a real important thing for kids to know queer people exist, for a lot of reasons, but also because kids can be clueless and it's embarrassing to have your grandmother be outted by a parrot because everyone just thought you'd figure it out on your own.

Anyway, here is my grandma and her wife, Oma, after they moved to Albuquerque to be artsy gay cowboys and live their best life. They helped run a "Lesbian Dude Ranch" out there (basically just with funding and financial support. As Oma has explained "traditionally, most lesbians don't have a lot of money" so they wrote the checks and let the younger ladies actually run the ranch.)

Oh, it's definitely a real number. It's just not a number that's a possible correct answer to any question that starts "how old", because it is more years than the universe has existed.

asexuals are queer pass it on

wow yall are still arguing in these notes huh

anyway asexuals are still queer, keep passing

(Aromantic too!)

You can gatekeep all you want but there is no fence. We will just go around your ass

This is from 2020, but it definitely still applies.

Still applies in 2024

ЯΞVΞ2

Happy Pride! Woke up to find that tumblr termed another TS woman without telling her (me) why!

For the past few months, Tumblr has been the source for the majority of my income through people sharing my leatherwork, and uhh pretty stressful to have that taken away.

I have so much I'd like to say on the ways TS women in particular are treated disposably, but I'll keep this short and say it would mean a lot both like emotionally and like materially if u shared this post so I could regain my friends and audience

My leather can be found at Pansy-Leatherwork.com. My entire shop is run on sliding scale, and I do my best to price things accessibly for the people I'm actually in community with