✧ 26 ✧ they/them ✧ Charlie's my name, getting overly attached to fictional characters is my game. T*rfs Stop Reblogging My Joke Posts And Go Directly To Hell Challenge 2k24 🏳️⚧️🙏🔮
I’m so fucking bad with faces and names that whenever I meet someone in a professional context I have to find a discreet moment in the conversation to email myself their name & then when i get home I look them up on social media and take a screenshot of their face and make an entry for them in my giant Notion database (where i also attach any relevant tags or notes like “Marketing” or “XYZ Event 2024” or “Has three ferrets. Had a long conversation about vampires”) like i’m a serial killer or a spy studying up on my secret identity except that the alter-ego i am trying to embody is actually Me But Socially Competent
Welsh grandma and Northern Irish grandpa have the same chaotic energy when it comes to the eternal struggle: is she a lesbian.. or a vegetarian?
Had the funniest possible interaction in Gay’s the Word the other day (literally the same bookshop featured in the first film) - one of the booksellers I was chatting to was about to give me recommendations for good local lunch places, then suddenly paused. Squinted.
“Are you… vegetarian?”
Reader, I had not said anything in the conversation thus far to lead her to believe this. We met 5 minutes ago. All she had to go was on was my knock-off-Alison-Bechdel-looking ass and the fact that I write sapphic historical fiction.
Reading Queen of the Damned rn and I am ON. THE. FLOOR. at this fucking 500yo grown ass vampire painstakingly feeding individual paper towels to the garbage disposal at 1am. Daniel. Hello, Daniel. Wake up, I need you to purchase some more food coloring for me Daniel. I saw an interesting recipe for glitter slime on the TikTok which I am interested in trying. And then I shall put it down the Garbage Disposer and listen to the delightful sound. Daniel please
first of all you’re so spot-on about the damage
second: on it
OP, dearest, idk how powerful a garbage disposer should be, but this image consumed my mind, ok..?
My family has started calling my cat “the beast” which is very funny considering she’s a 19yo arthritic old lady who needs help up and down the stairs. Not to mention she doesn’t really meow any more, just sits and stares at you, and im the only one who can reliably guess what she wants, so my parents are constantly messaging me “The beast awakens… I know not what she desires 😥😥” i feel like the chosen prophet of an eldritch god
Nay, verily… I have noted the position of the stars, and determined rather that The Beast Hungers… for her nightly plate of wet food
In King Ludwig II’s defense, if I had basically infinite discretionary funds, was accountable to absolutely no one, and was king of a country full of picturesque landscapes, you couldn’t stop me from building myself a big gay fairytale castle on a mountaintop either.
This post is spreading and I feel bad about it because it contains misinformation, so for the record: Ludwig II did not in fact have infinite discretionary funds. He only acted as if he did. He never dipped into the public coffers for his building projects, but he spent his own fortune extravagantly and borrowed heavily from everyone he could think of. By 1885, the year before his death, he was 14 million marks in debt.
ALT
